YES I CAN
It was good to be home. Despite everything that had been happening over the past few days, Luke liked being able to sleep in his own bed and eat food that actually tasted like food. (Number one cause of death: hospital food.) He had his family around him and the band was over more than before. There was a lot of support and a lot of help with the baby, and Luke couldn’t ask for anything more.
Except maybe a few more hours of sleep.
The baby (they named him Asher, much to Ashton’s excitement) was awake at odd times. And by odd times, that meant whenever Luke was about to fall asleep, he’d scream or cry and all hopes of some rest were gone. His parents helped for the most part, but Luke had to do a lot on his own too.
Like feeding the kid.
Four o’clock in the morning and he was in the kitchen heating up another bottle. Luke almost had this feeding schedule down. He could almost predict when Asher would start getting hungry again. But almost wasn’t enough. Luke knew that one day he’d get it and it would get easier, but he was just hoping that day would be, like, yesterday.
Asher was relatively calm compared to how he usually was. But he was also wide awake.
Luke started pacing around the kitchen while he waited for the bottle. He was still pretty hypnotized by Asher. Every day he seemed to be growing and looking more like Luke. Even his mannerisms were starting to be the same. He made faces when people stared at him, all of which he learned from Calum, but still. Unless he was crying, he was a quiet baby. And he ate a lot.
Asher started to whine and get fidgety, trying to express his hunger in the only way he knew how. Luke quickly gave him the bottle, holding it for the little baby.
On nights like that, Luke felt completely confident that he could raise Asher. Even if he was alone, on those nights he felt like he could do it. Usually, that feeling was fleeting however, because Luke was still clueless when it came to crying babies. He wasn’t entirely sure he’d ever get used to it. But he liked being a parent way more than he thought he would. After the uncertainty and panic, he found himself getting accustomed to things he never thought he would have to. Like stinky diapers and spit up on clothes.
Although he wouldn’t complain if for some reason he was able to get more sleep some nights.
I’m meeting my friend’s baby today and I’m so excited!!!!
The day that his baby boy would be going home was getting closer and closer. Luke didn’t feel ready. His parents had made arrangements for him to stay with them for the first few weeks. He’d overheard them talking about how hard it would be for him to go back to their shared apartment now. He hadn’t even thought about that. He was pretty sure there was still a pile of her clothes thrown on the bedroom floor. She’d never picked them up. And she never would.
On multiple occasions, her mother voiced her desire to raise the baby boy. She’d offered a couple times to go ahead and start custody papers before they even needed to take him home. Luke had never responded. Sometimes he thought it was a good idea, other times he’d think of how she’d react to him giving up their son like that. He was torn.
Departure Day finally came and it seemed like everyone was waiting with baited breath to see what Luke would decide.
Luke stayed awake the night before, going back and forth on his decision. On one hand, the baby was the last part of her Luke really have and he didn’t want to let that go. On the other, he didn’t feel like he could be the right person to raise him.
Ashton was the first one to stop by that morning. He stormed in and stood in front of Luke with his arms crossed and a determined look on his face. “Okay, I’m pretty sure I know what decision you’re going to make and I’m here to not let you do that.”
Luke sighed. “How are you going to do that?”
Ashton walked over to the bed and lifted up the baby boy. “Before all of this happened, Zoey asked me for a favor. She said if something ever happened to her, I need to be there to stop you from making a terrible decision. She was talking exactly about this. Her parents don’t need to raise him if you’re still here. She wants you to raise him. She’s always wanted that. She wants you to be there for this kid even if she’s not.” Ashton stood in front of Luke again. “Just hold him.”
Luke started to protest, but the look that Ashton was giving him was borderline insane and he kind of knew he didn’t have much of an option at this point. So he outstretched his arms and let Ashton place the baby into them.
He was expecting a lot more weight, but the kid was tiny and weighed basically nothing. He stayed completely still in the unfamiliar arms of Luke, staring up at him with uncertainty. And then he seemed to realize exactly who this was and nuzzled closer to Luke. He was completely content being held by Luke. Even if Luke was as awkward as he was at that moment. Luke couldn’t keep his eyes off of him though. This was his kid. They had the same blue eyes and everything.
“I could get used to this.” Luke mumbled, glancing up in time to Ashton looking smug. “Shut up.”
“I didn’t say anything!” Ashton quickly said. “But if I had said anything, I’d say that you’d be a good dad with a lot of help. And there’s plenty of people here that are willing to help you. So you should probably rethink that decision, okay?”
Luke stared down at the smaller version of himself and smiled a little. “Okay.”
the first part is here
part three here
It was blur of people by the time news had spread throughout their friends and family. His parents, her parents, Michael, and Ashton were at the hospital less than a few minutes of each other. It was chaotic, to say the least. Her parents stayed a small distance away, silently grieving for a daughter they hadn’t been able to say goodbye to. His parents stuck to his sides, sitting on the ground with him and trying to bring any kind of comfort to him. Despite the fact that Luke was there, he had never felt so far away before.
Ashton, Michael, and Calum were the only ones that went to see the baby. They stayed in the room and gave the family some space for most of the night.
Her parents were the first out of everyone in the hallway to go see the baby boy. Luke’s parents went in without him a while after. He refused to get up. He didn’t want to see this baby. He didn’t want to be anywhere around it unless she came back and they’re plan to raise him together came true.
However, if anyone needed to see this kid it was Luke and Ashton knew that.
Ashton always seemed to know what to do and how to help in situations that seemed hopeless. If that meant literally lifting Luke to his feet and shoving him into the room, then so be it.
Nurses and doctors had stopped by throughout the night and given the all clear. Surprisingly enough, this little boy was much more of a fighter than anyone had planned. He was only in the incubator for the first few hours of his life. They moved him into a regular baby bed and the family was allowed to hold him.
His sleeping form had already been passed around at least twice before Luke had entered the room.
“Take a seat.” Ashton said, guiding Luke into a chair. Her mother handed the little baby to Ashton. Luke shook his head.
“I’m not holding him.” He mumbled, earning a disbelieving look from Ashton. “I can’t. I won’t.”
“I think you’re forgetting who you’re talking to. You’re holding your kid. I don’t care if you don’t want to. He’s your kid and you’re his dad. Stop acting like that.” Luke shook his head, trying to block out Ashton’s words. He mumbled a small ‘I can’t’ before burying his face into his hands.
“Luke,” his mom knelt down beside him. “It’s going to be okay.”
“When?” he mumbled. “When I’m too exhausted to feel anything anymore? When I’ve been up for a week straight and just stop caring? I don’t want that. She was supposed to be here. I wasn’t supposed to be doing this alone.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” He felt like a kid again, being comforted by his mom. It was a weird feeling considering all of the growing up he’d had to do over the past few months. All of it seemed to have gone to waste now. The room stayed silent for a while aside the little noises the baby would make every so often. Ashton was still holding him.
“I can’t do this.” Luke mumbled. No one tried to convince him otherwise.
I gotchu homie
thanks for requesting!
The phone rang for what felt like hours. Luke sat outside the room, curled up on the floor. He felt numb. His mind wasn’t able to wrap around what had just happened. His mind seemed to refuse to let him think straight. And the phone just kept ringing and ringing and—
“Hello? Luke?” He let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and squeezed his eye shut. The sound of his mom’s voice was the only thing keeping him from completely losing the little bit of sanity he had left.
“So the baby’s here.” He mumbled, rubbing a hand across his face. “Two whole months early.”
There was a beat of silence. “How is he?”
“They said he should be fine.” Luke sounded so strained, even to himself. “But…”
“But?” There was suddenly a lot of urgency in his mom’s voice.
“She didn’t—“Luke stopped himself, sucking in a shaky breath and letting it out slowly. He couldn’t break down yet. Not on the phone. “Zoey didn’t make it?” Without meaning to, his voice rose just slightly at the end of the sentence. As if asking for conformation from his mom. As if she’d know better than he did about how Zoey hadn’t woken up after the strain.
His mom stayed silent, listening to him breathe in and out and try to calm himself down. He couldn’t break down on the phone. He just needed to remind himself of that.
“We’re on our way. Is anyone there with you?”
“Calum drove us here. He’s in the room now.” Luke ran a hand through his hair out of distress. He couldn’t help it, he broke down. He could hear his mom trying to soothe him, but he couldn’t comprehend anything she said.
Without fully noticing, Calum took the phone from him and gave his mom directions to the hospital and the room number they were in.
“The baby’s in an incubator for now, but everything looks okay.” Calum explained. He hung up a minute later and handed the phone back to Luke. “They’re on their way.”
“Yeah.” Luke’s voice sounded hollow. He felt hollow. “Okay.”
“I’m going to get something to eat.” Calum tilted his head in the direction of the elevator. “Want me to bring anything up?” Luke shook his head. “Well, I’m going to anyway. You okay with a ham sandwich?”
“Sure.” Calum reached down and patted his shoulder, mumbling something of reassurances before walking down the hall towards the elevator.
Luke heard the small cries of the baby boy inside the room. The baby must have noticed no one was with him and had felt scared and alone. Luke felt like he could relate.
my dad just walked in and gave me an icee
They flew to London two months after Emmie had moved in. She was on lockdown in the hotel for the first week. Every time she attempted to sneak out, there was a body guard or crowd of fans to stop her. Ashton had taken her phone, so there was no way she could even reach these friends of hers that seemed to pop up everywhere they went. She grumbled and complained the whole time but none of the guys paid her tantrums any attention. They weren’t about to waste time preparing for their new tour to go chase her around the city.
“Can I at least go see a movie?” Emmie asked, sprawled out on the couch and watching Ashton fix his hair. “There’s nothing on TV and I’m bored.”
“Calum could take you.” Ashton turned to look at her. “Luke and I have radio interviews today so Michael and Calum have the day off. They’d probably both take you depending on the movie.” Emmie rolled her eyes and grabbed the remote. “What?”
“Never mind, I’ll just watch reruns of Doctor Who or something.” She grumbled, flipping through the channels with no interest. “It would be cool to see London on my own, you know. Without any adult supervision considering I’m perfectly capable of handling things on my own.”
Ashton laughed. “Right, because you’ve proved that back in Sydney.” He grabbed a hoodie and turned to face her. “I don’t care what you do as long as Calum or Michael are with you. If you want to go see a movie, drag them with you.” He waved as he was leaving the room. “I’ll be back later tonight. Use Calum’s phone if you need to call me.”
“Why can’t I just have mine back?” Emmie demanded, jumping to her feet to follow him out into the hallway. Ashton ignored her though, opting for checking his own phone as he went to the elevator. Emmie sighed, turning to go back in the room. Yesterday she’d turned it upside down searching for her phone, but only found out that morning that the guys had kept it on them. Yesterday it had been Michael. Today was Luke. She glanced up in time to see the youngest band member walking down the hall towards the elevators. “Luke!”
He jumped and whipped around to face her, eyes wide from shock. “What?”
Emmie ambled over to him, giving him her sweetest smile. “Can I have my phone back?” Luke narrowed his eyes in suspicion as she stepped in front of him.
“Ashton told me not to give it to you.” Luke took a step back, too aware at how close she’d gotten to him. Emmie reached out to touch his arm.
“Yeah, but I need it.” She batted her eyelashes at him, tilting her head to the side. “Pretty please, Lukey?” The look in his eyes was all she needed. She had him pinned. Figuratively.
“No?” He didn’t have any more room to back into. His back was against the wall and Emmie was too close for him to slip by. “No.” He squared his shoulders and glared at her with determination. He refused to back down. “You can’t have it.”
Emmie sighed, looking away sadly. “Alright.” She shrugged. “I guess you’re just looking out for me. Being a loyal bandmate and all that.” She turned back to smile at him. “That’s really sweet of you, you know. Not everyone can say they have a friend like you.” She stepped up on her tip toes. “Guys like you are the best.” She pecked him on the cheek before taking a few steps back. “Thanks Luke.” She bounded back into her hotel room, leaving him in confusion.
Michael came walking down the hall, but stopped when he noticed Luke standing there in a daze. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing.” Luke said quickly, scrambling away from the wall. “I’m hungry.” Michael rolled his eyes. “What are you doing over here?”
“I was gonna check on Emmie. I’m sure she’d dying of boredom or whatever.” Michael knocked on the door that had just been closed in Luke’s face. There came no answer. “Emmie, it’s Michael.” Still nothing. Michael shook the doorknob, only for the door to fall open. Both guys peeked in, looking directly at an open window on the other side of the room. “You have got to be kidding me.”
Instantly, Luke reached into his back pocket where her phone had been. It was gone. He groaned, burying his face into his hands. “She totally played me.”
“Good one, idiot. Now she’s got her phone. Who knows where she’s going to end up now.” Michael slammed the door closed and stormed towards the elevators. “Ashton is going to murder all of us. I hope you’re happy.”
“I didn’t know that’s what she was doing!” Luke argued, following Michael into the elevator. “And we don’t have to tell Ashton. You and Calum can go look for her and I’ll keep Ashton distracted.”
“This isn’t some kid movie, Luke. His cousin ran off. He’s going to find out even if we don’t say anything.” Michael turned to glare at him. “Thanks a lot, Hemmings.”
“Technically, this is your fault too.”
“How?” Michael demanded.
Luke scrambled for words. “You should’ve checked on her earlier.”
The fact that Michael knew that would work with Ashton and bring him down too was the only reason he agreed to Luke’s plan. So while Luke went to go talk to Ashton and keep his attention on anything but Emmie, Michael went to tell Calum.
“I’m getting real tired of babysitting this chick.” Calum grumbled as they entered the elevator.
never watch “Make Your Move” with a kpop enthusiast
I will name every artist and song that starts playing and give you the top 5 facts about the group/solo
I’m gonna start doing ships!
give me your best description of yourself in whatever way you want, and I’ll ship you with someone in your favorite band/group!
I’ll give you..
i have no interest in small talk tell me about ur childhood and what ur parents are like and how many siblings u have and if u are afraid of death or if u believe in an afterlife and what ur favorite movie is and if u like romantic comedies or horror movies or action movies and what kind of music u like and why and tell me the bands or artists u loved in middle school but are too ashamed to admit to anyone else